erinclairyoga

My father was a big fan of The Doobie Brothers. He also died of cirrhosis of the liver when I was 24. I was bitter and numb about his death for so many reasons. Mostly, though, I was hurt because I felt that he didn't love me enough or he would have fought harder to stick around. On the way home from his funeral, this song came on the radio. I smiled because it reminded me of happy memories of him. Over the next few months after his death, the song kept popping up in random places, like at the grocery store or at the dentist. It felt like a message from my dad. As I hummed along each time, I felt a loving glow from him, and my bitterness and hurt began to melt away. I began to see him as merely a human being who did the very best he could, just like any of us. After all, "what a fool believes, he sees"--and aren't we all fools in different ways? Be gentle with each other, friends, and be gentle with yourself, because we are all fools with limited knowledge wandering about on earth for a short time. 

Song: What a Fool Believes

Artist: The Doobie Brothers

Flow Creator: @erinclairyoga

Approver: Anna Herz

In the song, she sings about hiding from her own happiness--"she hid around corners and she hid under beds; she killed it with kisses and from it she fled." I have done that my whole life: whenever something good happens, I find reasons to tell myself whatever I did what not good enough and could have been better. That means that over and over I refuse to allow myself to be truly happy. How often do we all do that? How often do we all tell ourselves we are not good enough and hide from our own happiness? Instead, why can't we try hiding from our own doubts about ourselves?

Song is "Dog Days Are Over"

Artist is Florence + the Machine

Flow by @erinclairyoga